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Dear Theo · Jun 30, 02:55 AM

Just rocked out in a chin up contest. 2:30 am. I don’t go in but I often hang out outside of Gold Bar. I like the people who work the door. A crew leaves and one dude starts doing chin ups on the yellow Do Not Walk/Walk sign. He did 20 no sweat. I was impressed. His whole crew was watching and cheering. I had to get in the mix. One dude who I know I met at Irv Gotti’s birthday party a few years ago told me I couldn’t do it because I’d burst out of my pants. I thought I was Jimmy and told him I’d do it by any jeans necessary (I’m not a Kanye fan but I just said these words).

I have no gym membership but I practice pull ups in the park by my house. Chin ups are easier and I rocked out ten super slow, super slow. I was wearing a fanny pack and I heard people making fun of it. I’d make fun of a kid wearing a fanny pack too. My only thought is that the dude who did a bunch of chin ups is a boxer. He did another set that would beat any one else’s first set.

My brother and I were working out at the Hollywood Y and we saw a guy do at least 40 pull ups. 40 might not seem like a huge number but go try to do 40 pull ups. I did pull ups nearly every day for a year and I only got up to 21. Then my next set was 3. So, this guy had a crazy lisp. He was from Crenshaw and he’d ride his bike to the YMCA in Hollywood. Work out for hours and hours and only drink water. He’d say, “Any one who doesn’t work out shouldn’t eat red meat. They don’t need it. You walk down the street, see a sign advertising Carl’s Jr. and you say to yourself, I want a burger I want a burger I want a burger.” I don’t want a hamburger. He’d yell it super crazy though. Dairy, forget it. I think about this guy every time I exercise. He was a pro boxer, too bad I’m terrible with names. He looked 30 but was almost 50.

And this gets me to an awesome guy I met up with tonight and had drinks with. His name is Rey and he climbed to the top of the New York Times building the other day. Why climb to the top of a building in Manhattan, because you can, you’re a strong able-bodied person. There is a whole story here though.

Before that I sold c.d.‘s so I could finance another day of life and before that I hung out with Lucy in front of the Tsubi store on Mulberry. Do you ever walk by and think, “why is this 85 year old woman hanging out in some super hip store for?” Well, she used to own and run a candy store in that space. She’s always lived above it and she pays in the two figures per month rent. She had great stories about Gotti’s club up the block (not Irv) and she warned me never to live on Elizabeth Street.

Hey Chris Sikora, I wrote you a letter today and I didn’t write a lot of things on this computer so the letter would be a surprise. I ate a pound of broccoli today, an apple, cheese, an Odwalla bar and had some drinks. Gotta get some sleep as I’m looking forward to the Endless Boogie record release party tomorrow at Mercury Lounge. It is the most anticipated event in my immediate life. My birthday doesn’t matter yet.

And, when I was walking home tonight I imagined that all of my friends grew up in Norwood Park and that they had that influence in their lives. Unfortunately some of them never left Norwood Park and they never got to become my friend.

After those chin ups, every one got into Escalades. I’m not a car person. I’m not an air conditioning person and I’m not an American Apparel person or an H&M person. It’s all fake to me. And, Kool Keith is right, p-i-s-s on the N.B.A.

“True metal people wanna rock, not pose.” -Manowar On a broader scale this applies to everyone. Kool Keith said, “New York is Hollywood, everyone is sportin’ them shirts.” It wasn’t me.

Pictures are always fun. I hung out with these kids and four more. The mother was 27, my age now, two were adopted, Keisha wow. This was in Virginia, deep. A memorable day, I stayed at the house the entire day and drank more grape sodas than I have my whole life combined. Don’t invite me over because I might not leave. I don’t hang out with kids ever. I did teach one summer at a school for kids with learning disabilities but I felt like I was on the same level as the students. I could be myself. Other kids, I don’t want to be around. Kids aren’t cute to me. A monkey on television is cute or Homer Simpson when he goes, “Oh Oh spagetti-o,” is cute on some level, but I don’t know. I was swimming at the Soho house the other day and this little kid, maybe five years old rolls up to me and asks, “Who are you going to vote for?” I asked him who he was going to vote for and he said, “If I was of voting age, I’d vote for Barack.” First of all, how bored must that kid have been to talk to me and second, but he was awesome because he kept hitting the beach ball that me, him, Heater, and his mother were slapping around, into this dude wearing a speedo who took hid drink into the pool. You can’t take your drink into the pool. No second of all necessary.

My conclusion for the day is that anyone who feels disconnected from his or her environment works too much in a place that isn’t fulfilling. I love my block, whether it’s East Circle, Hayes St., Franklin, Perry St. or Little Clarendon, because I hung out hard right there, especially Perry.

And Nish, you did not see Joe on a dirt bike riding down Elston.

Oprah might want to have you on her show. Have you ever seen a designer of your caliber on her program? Maybe she’d put you up at the Drake.

And, I don’t know how much time you have to do something less important than helping someone cross the street but I love this video…

It’s a quest, give me a break.

— Young Philosopher

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Comment

  1. what a really fun and totally disjointed rundown of facts and stories! the boxer’s name was Stonewall…and he really did do 40 perfect, fully extended pull ups.!

    — joerimej4f · Jun 30, 12:25 PM · #

  2. Guess I’ll never print on American Apparel shirts again. I like the normal ones with yoke necks but really don’t get the super-Vs, they’re incredibly guido. And there’s no room left to print anything.

    robert trent · Jul 1, 06:25 AM · #

  3. Albin, Those songs get me so hyped. Feel like I could lift a house too them. Important listens taugh by Tupac and Scarface. Lived by AMS. Happy belated bday

    joseph nakis · Jul 6, 10:14 PM · #

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